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View Full Version : Democrat, Republican, or Southerner?


kamo
07-28-2006, 03:00 PM
Thought i would share this email i got just now...


Democrat, Republican, or Southerner?



Are you a Democrat, Republican or Southerner?

Here is a little test that will help you decide. The answer can be found by
posing the following question:

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children.


Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner,
locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife,
and charges at you. You are carrying a Glock 40, and you are an expert shot.

You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?

Democrat's Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question! Does the man
look poor or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

Could we run away?

What does my wife think?

What about the kids?

Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his
hand?

What does the law say about this situation?

Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?

Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this
send to society and to my children?


Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound
me?

If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he
was stabbing me?


Should I call 9-1-1?

Why is this street so deserted?

We need to raise taxes, have paint and a weed day and make this a happier,
healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for few
days and try to come to a consensus.






Republican's Answer:



BANG!



Southerner's Answer:




BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click.....
(Sounds of reloading) BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click

Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or
Federal Hollow Points?"

Son: "Can I shoot the next one?"

Wife: "You ain't taking THIS one to the Taxidermist!"

jmz5
07-28-2006, 03:18 PM
haha, another oldie, I like your new avatar

anoldsman
07-28-2006, 03:22 PM
That was soo funny that my co-workers just had to look into my office to see what was going on. Thnaks for the laugh on a very long Friday. :) :) :)

Chris

Esteves
07-28-2006, 03:28 PM
Southern FsN Owner:
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click (Sounds of reloading)
...

jmz5
07-28-2006, 03:32 PM
thats more like it, or the 10rd mag extension

btown02
07-28-2006, 03:33 PM
Or all the bangs and a "keep him covered Bubba while I reload".

Medula Oblongata
07-30-2006, 06:36 AM
Were that to happen to me there would be a loud bang followed by a "whooshing" sound as I fired my RPG-7 at him... Of course there wouldn't be much of the guy, or the sidewalk he was standing on, left and it may be a little had to explain to the cops.

"Honestly, officer, it WAS one of those crazy robe wearin, frothing at the mouth A-rabs, I swear! He had a towel on his head and everything! You should have seen the knife he had, it was THIS big! No, officer, it wasn't a possum. I know what a possum looks like. See here, if you put the pieces of cloth back together, it kinda looks like a turbine... I know that possums are mean, but this guy was screaming A-la this and A-la that. No I haven't been drinking..."

jmz5
08-03-2006, 08:45 PM
haha, he was yelling dirka dirka something, lol